I Love Cheese… Also, I Have The Hiccups. They Hurt.

I just noticed that the first line of my last blog was quoted back to me yesterday morning by one of my favorite pieces of eye candy… lol… i wonder if that’s from reading this or mere coincidence… hmmmm….

sometimes i go on writing hiatus… it’s not my fault… i just get really busy with other things… in fact, i can’t even recall the last time i had an entire day to myself… looks like there’s gonna be another venture to AC soon for some much needed Kristina time… lol… really i just get a room for two days masturbate, pass out and order expensive room service… totally normal…

i just got done working out with my trainer… i’m feeling pretty good about my progress so far… there is a definitely a photo shoot in the near future!

until then… here’s another video request!

it’s taking a really long time to upload… i’m starting to get bored… over an hour now of this… too bad the inspection station doesn’t offer free wifi while you wait in its eternal line of carbon monoxide poisoning… in actuality, i would pretty much make up any excuse to put it off another day…


How To Eat Pussy <—– Click that.

okay! no more excuses! bank, home depot, inspection, work. go!

Warm Bum

The Car Buying Gods were FINALLY on my side!!!! i got the car i wanted with the payment i wanted and all the cool shit in it i wanted!!! 2009 Nissan Maxima with the premium package!!! whoop whoop!! i call him Max! He’s got seat warmers… i’ve never had them before and when the sales dude made a huge deal of them and the steering wheel warmer i kinda made fun of him for such a stupid thing… but i’ve gotta admit… i didn’t know what i was missing… those two things are seriously the best part of the car… especially since it’s -12 degrees outside… haha… Max is also super fast! i feel like i’ve taken 10 years off my life going back to a sporty car. I can’t wait to make him super cool… My favorite people at Auto Image are gonna tint him, give him a cool spoiler, remote starter, shiny wheels and cool ass radio! yay! can’t wait!

MAX!!!! Far far away… next to a shopping cart… perhaps i should move that… haha!!

last night as i crawled my way into bed after yet another exhausting day I decided it’s far more satisfying to set my alarm early and get the guilty pleasure of hitting the snooze button 4 times than it is to set it for the time i actually have to wake up… i feel like i’m getting away with something.. haha… defiant mind of mine… but whatever works right?

another thing before we get started… i find it very annoying when people post vague statuses about going to the emergency room or someone dying… is it just me or is the only thing people want to know is why or how??? so what do i do next… play detective… check previous postings… read through all the comments on peoples “i’m so sorry you were such a good person” posts… and still nothing comes up… try to find a news article… nothing… perhaps check the obituaries in a few days… but they do the same thing… don’t tell you the one detail everyone really wants to know… and for some reason it’s rude to ask… so i’m just putting this out there… if i go to the hospital without being conscience or die suddenly this is what i want…

1. break my phone

2. clear my browser history

3. post on my facebook what the fuck happened to me

this way… there is no awkwardness and people don’t have to feel uncomfortable asking… plus i’m sure the story would be pretty cool to tell anyway….

so a few blogs ago i asked if anyone wanted to see old pics… apparently everyone does!! yay!… so i started going through my computer… i can’t find any… literally the only thing i have is actual pictures… weird… i guess i was either not that smart back then or waaaaay smarter than i am now keeping everything digitally only… so to remedy this… i’m gonna take some time and scan them into my computer… i need a scanner for this… i’m gonna buy one prolly next week or the week after.  if anyone wants to get me one sooner i’ll certainly take it.

One more thing… Congrats to my bestest friend in the whole entire world on her engagement!!! we’re going to the gym like 4 times a week now so we look hot in our dresses… it’s definitely easier to drag ourselves there when we have each other to not let down…

there’s a really creepy lady hobbling around outside and whistling… other than that it’s been a very quiet our here… literally one customer… saturdays are usually busier… but it is january… i’m hoping to take a day off soon and go down to AC for a massagey….

let’s see what we’ve got in the picture vault!

dry cleaning conundrum… dry clean only on one label machine wash on the other… on the same jacket…. whoa!

backed in… but quit in the middle

ugh… i sometimes wonder when will it stop? but then i wouldn’t have anything to post…

maybe he got that X for not being able to spell? i wonder if he’s an ex- chef or ex-chief?

bad picture but this license plate says “bighipz” i suppose that’s okay as long as there’s not a “bigstomach” to go with it.

went in for a slice… and stayed there to eat it… i like the wheels tho…

crooked and stupid.

sign company… hanging a sign… in the air??? maybe on that tree?

and now some pics of me in knee high socks and a thong as requested!

and one from the work bathroom!  good news about that actually… the compressor behind me is getting moved out of there next week… now i’ll be able to take full advantage of the mirror and not get all gross or hurt from touching it!

oh great Nick is back and the door is wide fucking open… it’s only arctic outside… burrrrr…. it used to annoy me when my parents asked me if i live in a barn…. i get it now but what they really meant to ask was… “do you live in a retirement village?”


Giant Run-On Sentence

Yay! for the increase in my social security tax that i’ll never see when i’m old cuz people live way to long… whoever the fuck invented the work for 25 years then retire for 50 years after that and use waaaaaay passed your contribution to the system system should be shot. like seriously… how is that fair… you should get back what you pay in and that is it. how about work until you fall the fuck over and die… then we won’t need social security and we won’t have as much national debt.. all people are created equal but then they grow up… some people work their asses off and some are lazy mother fuckers… those people who CHOOSE to be lazy mother fuckers should not be entitled to the same life style as people that put forth effort… it’s the land of opportunity… yet the only people who seem to benefit are the ones who know how to navigate the welfare system… where’s my check for being a law-abiding, tax paying, non-drug using, pay for my own health care contributing to society spending my money in stores to help stimulate the economy and not just sitting around and complain about shit bonus. where the fuck is that money? maybe i’ll go slip and fall someone where and sue a big corporation… yeah i’ll get mine THE AMERICAN WAY!! ughhhhhh so annoyed.

Buzzing In The New Year

ya know like instead of ringing! lol

i was ahead of the curve this year… i signed up for training sessions again but on like December 30th… i’m two days better than everyone else… i’ve also discovered the reason it didn’t really work out for me the last time… i was working out in my house… that is gonna stop… i’m far too distracted by everything when i’m there… cooking dinner, phone ringing, what’s on the tv… all that crap… at least in the gym i’m more focused. and, of course, there  will be less whining because people are watching… haha… whatever it takes i guess. what really motivated me the most to get back in shape was when i discovered a stash of old pictures… ugh… found my after picture from a contest i did at the gym almost 5 years ago… man i looked good… tan… tight… but much smaller in the chesticles… lol… either way… i want that back… i was also wondering if anyone would like to see some of the photo shoots we used to do back in the day… my boobs were sooooo little… it’s kinda cute… well let me know in the comment section!

i suppose if the cops can do it… so can dudes with little black sports cars…

HAHA! you’re in trouble!

3 blondes and a red head are at a 4 way stop…. i’m the red head that’s doing 0 mph while these idiots drive into each other…

WHYYYYY…. do people lick their fingers and then touch money they intend on handing to me????? so nasty… eew.

one more…

this place is dangerous. lol

Got another request done!!! check it out and leave me some love!