The Naked-Ish Man / Smooth Operator

So… here’s the amount of hours i worked last week…2015-05-23 16.20.22

and that’s not even counting the rides home i gave people.

so anyways… after a week of total bullshit, having to be the driver, having a presser out, having the machines break over and over again, and of course it was the busiest week of the year… i was rewarded in the most unusual way…

now i’ve been doing this for like 15 years or so and i’ve seen and done what i thought was everything… until saturday afternoon.

this customer called and said that pants he just got altered weren’t done properly… of course the tailor wasn’t here and i had to track him down… he brought the pants back around 2:30 and we got the problem fixed… he then goes into the fitting room to put the entire outfit on… a marine one…

like 15 minutes goes by and he comes out of the fitting room but not in the uniform… so me and my worker inquire… he had these stupid little sock strap things with horrible little rubber nubs at the ends of them that attach to the bottom of the shirt to keep everything in place and they wouldn’t stay on… so my worker and i were like no problem! we rig shit all the time. this is easy… so we pin the straps to the socks and send him back into the fitting room… waaaay too much time goes by and he decides that since they popped off that maybe he needed dress socks instead… so i send my worker to dollar tree to get some different socks… she comes back and i go to hand them to him under the door… he opens the door and we get a nice glimpse of his very blue very fitting boxer briefs… he closes the door and we have a giggle… waaaay too much times goes by… so cut to the good part… there i am on my knees in front of this guy pinning straps to his shirt and alls he’s wearing is the socks the shirt and those very lovely bright blue undies. his cock is like inches from my hands and i’m like reallllly hoping i don’t accidentally stab him with a pin.  it would have been easy to do given the size of the bulge. the entire time i’m wondering if this is a fucking joke and there’s like someone outside filming me for some tv show… i get it, i write about all sorts of hypothetical naughty fitting room tales but this guy actually went and did it! and to my knowledge, completely unknowingly!! so anyways… then he turns around… what an ass on this man… ugh… this is torture… i question getting married for a split second… i’m also thankful he was wearing clean underwear. i make a statement to that thought out loud. so pinning the back is way harder than pinning the front cuz his butt is nice and round. that’s okay tho… i’m enjoying the view and i’ve got all the time in the world. so i finally complete my task and he goes back into the fitting room to get dressed… i finish my cold grilled cheese that’s been sitting there an hour now… he comes out and the straps were on wrong… he decides to scrap the straps… haha… all that for nothing. well not nothing… cuz then i look him up on facebook… 30 MUTUAL FRIENDS!!!! 30. thirty. THIRTY??!! how do i not know this guy??? so i send him a message… i know I KNOW totally creepy… but i figured i’ve already been introduced to his crotch i may as well send a friend request. lol. i thank him and also question him for the lack of boner… (i really wouldn’t have minded but the old lady customers that were in the store might have) so yeah… that was my saturday afternoon…

May The 4th… On May 5th

cuz yesterday was crazy busy and i was by myself at work.

people were asking me to re-post some of my Star Wars photo shoot pictures… well here they are… these were taken in 2010 by the wonderful Richard Johnson. He also photographed my wedding which is where my header picture came from!

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Ridiculous

The amount of underwear I’m getting rid of is absurd. Lol.

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And for the person who thought I was exaggerating on the hits my blog has… let’s count the digits together.

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4. 0. 3. 9. 1. 9.  That’s 6 digits. Which is the hundred thousands. 9 is in the ones column. 1 is in the tens column. 9 is in the hundreds column. 3 in the thousands column.  0 in the 10 thousands column. Which by your logic I’d only be up to 3900 hits cuz no one puts a zero before the number on the left of the decimal.  And finally.. where’s that 4? Oh in the hundred thousand column.

Serious inquiries only on the underwear. Lol just kidding not for sale.